I’ve been having hot car sex with a girl half my age – but can it last? – The Sun

DEAR DEIDRE: I’M having fantastic sex with a girl half my age.

It’s brilliant now, but can this work long-term?

I’ve been married for 12 years and we have two wonderful children together, a boy and a girl.

But our relationship hasn’t been great for the last five years.

I am 38 and my wife is 39.

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We hardly talk except about arrangements for the kids and we’ve stopped having sex.

My wife often says she wants us to split up and to find herself someone else to have sex with.

I don’t know how I am supposed to react to that.

So life was very gloomy until this 18-year-old girl started working at our local gym.

Our daughter does gymnastics there and our son does karate.

I take them, so I’m usually at the gym four times a week.

Now I’ve decided to get fit and am going on my own account, meaning I’m there most days.

I don’t know what it is about me that caught her eye, but this girl was quickly very flirty.

We talked lots from the start and she is amazing.

She was on the desk one evening and I was leaving close to the time the gym shuts.

I said I was parched and fancied a drink, and asked if she’d like to come too.

She jumped at it and everything went from there.

We did only have a couple of drinks that time, but a few weeks later we had sex in the back of my car.

It was in the gym car park after everyone had left.

Now I usually drive somewhere quiet, but we can’t go on like this.

She’s an amazing person but I feel I’m doing wrong because of the age gap.

She tells me it’s OK and it’s what she wants.

My head’s a mess.

I feel my marriage is over, but is what I’m doing out of order or could it work out with this girl?

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DEIDRE SAYS: I really doubt it.

Girls who go for much older men often have emotional issues, which tend to make them needy.

She may be happy and flirty now but how well would she cope with the amount of time you’d need to give your children even if you did split up with your wife?

And would you be ready to have another family, which is what she would probably want in time even if she says not now?

Your marriage may be in a mess but that doesn’t mean cheating is the right way to sort it out.

How could you justify this to your children, no matter what your wife has been saying?

End your affair and tell your wife you have to start talking to one another so you can either save your marriage or end it in the way that best protects your children from the fall-out.

A counsellor could help you both to communicate.

See relate.org.uk or tavistockrelationships.org.

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