My husband has completely let himself go… I'm sick of it

DEAR DEIDRE: THESE days my husband isn’t bothered about leaving the house in unironed clothe, or wearing his shabbiest trainers and not combing his hair.

He simply doesn’t care any more.


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I have tried several ways to approach him about it but he doesn’t see a problem.

He knows it bothers me, so will make an effort for a few days. But then things go back just how they were. I am 34 and he’s 36.

We have been married for 12 years and have two boys. I feel like I am only in the marriage for our sons’ sakes.

I want to love him but my feelings are becoming more and more negative.

DEIDRE SAYS: You can’t let this go on. You will only feel increasingly negative towards him and your relationship will continue to deteriorate.

Sometimes when someone is very low, keeping clean feels like far too much effort. If it is possible that he is depressed, he needs to see his GP.

Otherwise, explain to him how you are feeling and say your relationship will keep going downhill if things stay as they are. I’m sending you my support pack Standing Up For Yourself, which will help you talk to him.

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