I'm a mum-of-four under 3 — I fell pregnant with twins when my first were 7 months… people always feel sorry for me

DIAGNOSED with endometriosis as a teen, Kirsty Hannam, 32, from Frome, Somerset, was told she’d probably never have children of her own.

Here she shares her twin-credible journey to multiple motherhood as told to Eimear O’Hagan.

After tucking my children into their cots and kissing them goodnight, a wave of gratitude overwhelms me.

I once believed I’d never have one child, yet now I’m a mum to two sets of twins under three.

My periods started in my early teens and were always very painful and heavy.

Although I went to the GP several times about it, I was simply prescribed pain relief and led to believe I was just unlucky.

By the time I was 18, the pain was so bad I was referred to a gynaecologist. They diagnosed me with endometriosis, a condition where tissue grows outside the uterus.

I was told it could affect my ability to conceive in the future, which was devastating.

Most read in Fabulous

FIT FOR A KING

Inside 'forgotten castle' that may become Will & Kate's new family home

NO KIDDING

My daughter is a teen mum and I refuse to help her with childcare on weekends

TATT'S BAD

I wanted spider web tattoo- people reckon it looks like something VERY different

MUMBELIEVABLE

I’m 7 months pregnant with no baby bump, people say they can't even tell

When I was young, whenever anyone asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I’d always say: “A mummy.” So to hear that it might not be possible was a lot to take in. 

After my diagnosis, I had several surgeries to remove the endometriosis tissue, during which doctors also discovered I had recurrent ovarian cysts. I was told I’d need further procedures to treat these – at least 10 in total with the surgery to remove the endometrial tissue – and that the chance of me ever becoming pregnant was slim.

There was nothing I could do but hope that I might be lucky. My girlfriend and I celebrated our civil partnership in 2010.

We both desperately wanted children, and for two and a half years we tried to conceive using donor sperm, but for some reason it wasn’t successful. 

It was devastating that endometriosis was stopping me from becoming a mother. After growing apart from each other, my partner and I split up in 2019, and I sadly accepted that it was unlikely I’d ever have a child.

In summer 2018, I started dating Rob, now 34, who works for the NHS. We’d known one another for 16 years, after becoming friends at school, but then our relationship turned romantic.

I was immediately honest with him about my infertility and he insisted he would be happy if it was only ever just the two of us.

Three months into our relationship, we moved in together, but just a few weeks later, in October 2018, I began to feel peculiar in a way I’d never experienced before.

I suspected I was pregnant, but told myself not to be silly – as well as my endometriosis, I was on the mini Pill to help with my symptoms. 

I couldn’t shake the feeling, though, and confided in Rob, who agreed I should do a pregnancy test.

When it showed a positive result, I almost dropped it in shock as Rob scooped me up into a hug.

'WE WERE EXCITED'

I felt everything from disbelief to amazement, but also worry, because I knew that my endometriosis could cause an ectopic pregnancy, where the embryo develops outside the womb and isn’t a viable pregnancy.

My GP referred me for an early scan at six weeks and when the sonographer said: “Everything looks fine and in the right place – and there are two babies,” my jaw dropped. Rob and I both have cousins who are twins, but I thought they were too far removed for it to be hereditary.

Seeing two little heartbeats flickering on the screen, we both cried tears of surprise and happiness. We left the hospital shell-shocked – we’d only just got used to the idea of having a baby at all, and now we were having two.

At the time, I was a field-care supervisor, though we still worried about the cost of having twins. 

But nothing could detract from the joy in knowing I was going to be a mum. 

My pregnancy wasn’t easy. I suffered from hyperemesis gravidarum and was very sick, but Rob was my rock.

On June 11, 2019, William and Willow were born weighing 5lb 9oz and 6lb 7oz, after I went into labour naturally at 37 weeks. Lying in bed with a baby nestled in each arm, I was the happiest woman in the world.

Six months later, I was advised to have a hysterectomy as my endometriosis had worsened and I was struggling to cope with the pain. Nothing could be done apart from removing my womb. 

After being lucky enough to have the twins, Rob and I had felt our family was complete, but suddenly we considered trying for another child. We agreed to delay my operation by six months and if it didn’t happen, we’d accept it wasn’t meant to be.

To our huge shock and happiness, a month later, I was pregnant again. We knew it was going to be hard work having another child when William and Willow were still so young – just seven months old at that point – but we were excited.

It never crossed my mind that we could have twins again, until the six-week scan in early March 2020 when the sonographer broke the news.

Bursting into hysterical tears, I couldn’t process the fact we were going to have four children under 18 months. Rob held me while I sobbed and reassured me that we would cope.

My second pregnancy was even harder than my first. Not only was I sick again, but I was also a full-time mum, having decided not to return to my job because of Covid and the cost of childcare.

On days when I felt so nauseous I couldn’t even take the twins to the park, I felt guilty that I was missing out. But what was really upsetting were people’s comments when they saw the twins in their pram and my bump.

“You’re a glutton for punishment, aren’t you,” one woman said. “I feel sorry for you,” said another. 

Nesting for a second set of twins, who we discovered were non-identical girls at the 20-week scan, was expensive.

'IT'S QUITE A SPECTACLE'

We had to move from our small two-bedroom house into a three-bedroom bungalow, as well as buy a second-hand seven-seater car, four child car seats and two more cots.

With Rob’s wage the only money coming in, we scrimped and saved, scouring Facebook Marketplace for bargains. 

On October 14, 2020, Alice and Aoife were born at 36 weeks, weighing 5lb 3oz and 5lb 6oz. As I held them, all my worries faded away. Nothing else mattered but the fact we had four beautiful children.

William and Willow are now two and a half, and Alice and Aoife are 15 months and life is as busy and tiring as it is fun and wonderful. They are very close and play beautifully together.

The older pair go to nursery two days a week, and the other days I have all four at home while Rob works. I feed them in two shifts, and we get through 140 nappies a week. At least one child is up every night, so broken sleep is the norm.

When I take them out in their quad pram, it’s quite a spectacle. People stare and ask if I’m a childminder – they’re inevitably stunned when I say all four are mine.

Rob and I still make time for one another – his mum babysits so we can go out for a meal, though we’ve never had a night away from the children.

I’m on a waiting list for the hysterectomy, and this time I’ll definitely have it! But I’m so glad we tried again, as I now can’t imagine life without my big brood.

It doesn’t matter that I never get to the bottom of the ironing pile or the house is full of toys. As hectic, expensive and exhausting life with multiple multiples is, I’ll never take for granted how lucky I am.  

  • Photography: Tom Wren/SWNS



    Source: Read Full Article