I can't stop thinking about my wife in bed with another man

DEAR DEIDRE: I CAN’T enjoy sex because I’m thinking about the things my wife said and did with a guy she had an affair with.

I’m 39 and my wife’s 36. We’ve been married for six years.

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We love one another very much and my wife supports me in everything I do.

But I found messages on her phone to this man saying things like: “You were on another level last night” and “I can’t wait for a repeat performance.”

There were pictures and videos of them together on a weekend spa break.

She apologised when I confronted her.

I have decided to give her another chance because I love her.

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But I’m struggling to enjoy sex because I can’t remove this image of them together.

I don’t know how to move on.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Betrayal can erode a relationship and building trust will take time.

Tell your wife that she has to own how much she hurt you and be truly sorry – and she must delete those pictures and messages.

When images of her with the other guy come to mind, paint over them with memories of your best times together.

My support pack Cheating – Can You Get Over It will help you to move on.

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